While I consider myself to be fairly well-read and educated, sufficiently versed in the arts (for someone who grew up in Las Vegas), and culturally aware, it has come to my attention as a grown-up that there are some things that I know absolutely nothing about. I don't mean thermodynamics, or how to split an atom, I'm talking about regular things grown-ups should know.
#1. The Stock Market. I do not have the first clue about the NYSE. I don't know how to read the stocks page in the paper, and my eyes glaze over when someone is talking about someone named Nasdaq. (I don't know who he is.)
#2. I have never driven a motorcycle.
#3. Music. This one is most frustrating, because I enjoy music. I have strong opinions about music. I like everything from the offensive to the sublime. I listen to Classical, Jazz, Metal, Pop, Rock, Smooth Rock, Classic Rock, Alternative Rock. I listen to Bluegrass, Zydeco, Opera, and Blues. Old School Rap, Classic R & B, New Wave, and Disco. I do not know the first thing about how to make music, record it, mix it, or amplify it. I have never had the obligatory piano lessons. Heck, I've never been able to get a real sound out of a harmonica. (Note: I do hate harmonicas. Sorry Blues Traveler fans.) Obviously, I can't read the little ants on lines that is sheet music. The mixing board is so utterly confusing to me that it might as well be an atom-splitting device.
#4. Bodies of Water. Ok, really this is just a Jeopardy catagory that I suck at.
#5. Electronics. Ok, I'm not a total Troglodyte. I can manage to get the television on occasionally and I can do the basics on my computer. I have an iPod and a camera. I can text as fast as a 14 year old girl and I can also manage to Photoshop my forehead wrinkles out. I have some skills. Here's where I'm lost. I do not know what a Blue Ray is. I don't know why I need one. Tell me again why I want to watch crappy TV shows on my computer, Hulu? Plasma? Sorry, don't know. High Def? Don't know/care. Mac vs. PC? Color me "logged out" of this debate. I have had 8-Track, Cassette, Record, CD, and digital formats. I'm done people. If I have to replace my Judas Priest collection for one more format I'm going to shank someone in the Electronics Industry.
I have laid bare my ignorance for all to see in cyberspace. Please just don't ask me about cyberspace!
I is smart.
just Dawn
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What no mention of country music?! Did you leave it out because you understand it? If you do need an education in country music I'm available . . . no charge for my friends.
ReplyDeleteYou discredited yourself w/ the whole "not knowing stuff" thing by using the word "troglodyte." Who needs to know about the stock market when you know the correct context in which to use "troglodyte"? (Also, loved "i is smart.")
ReplyDeletehey absolutely agree with the shank. After replacing 3 formats so far, the MP3 is killing me. Now i can get all the albums i had PLUS the same album live, PLUS the same album live at a reunion tour etc. at 99cents a song by the time i finish it all someone else will be rich.
ReplyDeleteI was a business major & still don't get that stuff, never rode a motorcycle either, can't read music after trying to study it as well, & I know how to DVR but no clue how people record to DVDs. I have converted a VHS to DVD once. Now when I get on television again, if I didn't record it on VHS how would I go from DVR to a DVD to save forever? This is getting ridiculous! I do like to look at bodies of water but not go drown in them!
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